Monday, April 28, 2014

I'm a Naughty Yogi: 10 Confessions of Very "Unyogic" Behavior

Doing yoga is  more than just being able to flow through an asana practice with grace, it is about being a good person. I struggle with both constantly! I know we are all supposed to be positive and perfect in yoga, but as the inflexible yogi I just wanted to remind you not all of us wanna be yoga teachers are perfect as Yoga Journal and other such publications would lead you to believe. 

1. I hate waking up early 

I'm not going to lie to you, most of my sun salutations are in fact moon salutations. I've been a night owl since my mother let me loose from the crib where I would leave piles of toys all over the house as I rampaged through the night! I know what the yoga teachers say "all the good energy" blah, blah, blah is in the morning. I just don't feel that good energy before noon or coffee. 

2. I get very angry about politics 

I don't even want to get into it. To keep it simple, I dislike greed, oppression and prejudice in all forms. Guess which party I'm part of? 

3. I eat a lot of animals without remorse

Sorry. Chicken, cows, pigs and even baby sheep are delicious. I can't stop. I do try to support natural and organic meat whenever possible. Even the Dalai Lama eats meet though! So I honestly don't feel too bad about this one. I just try to honor the animal I am enjoying by not wasting or overindulging in tasty, tasty meat. 

4. I think a lot of homeopathy is crap and harmful

Antibiotics, painkillers and all that good stuff modern medicine brought us- there is nothing wrong with using these innovative  medicines. Chewing on flowers that we wouldn't ever naturally have eaten is not useful. I'm sure those dealing in homeopathic medicine are laughing all the way to the bank. I know i'm laughing all the way to the bank from all the money those homeopathic-medicine-selling clients pay me to write articles LYING for them (I did stop writing for these type of clients, because I felt evil). So please, PLEASE, if you are sick and modern medicine can fix it, don't let delusional romances of homeopathic cures stop you. 

5. I just WANT to be more flexible

I know, I'm not supposed to really want this. I do. I'm working on not worrying about being flexible, but just let me do this one more hamstring stretch...

6. Sometimes I think the journey sucks. 

Long car rides, plane rides, lines, waits and all that really annoy me. The romance behind road trips is a mystery to me. I can't wait for the day that I can just teleport somewhere. 

7. Slouchasana is my number one posture! 

I'm slouching at the keyboard as I type this. BAHHAHAA. Oh man, I really need to work on sitting up straight. 

8. I sometimes compare myself to others 

This one is terrible. I was raised to be a very competitive person, so even with considerable effort not to I still compare myself to other people. Even in yoga class (sometimes)- although I have gotten a lot better at just focusing on myself in yoga class.  

9. The big picture often escapes me 

Sometimes, I obsess about little tiny things that don't matter. Putting things in perspective is something I also am actively working on.  

10. I love cocktails and wine 

Sometimes I over-indulge just a tiny bit. Although I do not drink very often, when I do I sometimes have one drink more than I probably need. Wine and cocktails are just so tasty. I can't wait until they invent synthehol, an alcohol from Star Trek that has all the good things from alcohol with none of the bad effects.


Don't be ashamed to have flaws as a yogi! Own your flaws! Ultimately that is the only way you can try to improve as a person!

Cheers to all the naught yogis out there!

No comments:

Post a Comment